Write something silly? To cheer someone up? I'd never do that!

[missroserose]

In response to this request, I present the following article.

Strout, Rothfuss to battle through characters

NEW YORK – Rising-star fantasy authors Anton Strout and Patrick Rothfuss have decided to settle their long-time feud the old-fashioned way – with a duel. But the choice of weaponry may surprise you.

“We’ve all heard that the pen is mightier than the sword,” Rothfuss said in a coffee-shop interview, set up via email after repeated attempts to locate him at his cabin in rural Wisconsin failed. “And both being gentlemen of the pen, Strout and I have decided to resolve our differences through our characters, with a round-robin collaborative crossover story.” Asked why they hadn’t picked a more traditional dueling medium, Rothfuss hedged, “I suggested the story. I hardly felt sporting challenging him to a battle of physical prowess - wussy East Coast folks who grew up with central heating just can’t defeat born-and-bred Wisconsinites, and we shouldn’t hold that against them.”

Strout, unsurprisingly, had a different story to tell. “Don’t believe anything that uncultured bear tells you,” he said, speaking to us in person in the library of his well-appointed suburban New Jersey home. Shifting in his leather wing-backed chair, he picked up a pipe and polished it on the corner of his velvet jacket as he continued. “His hot-headed Wisconsin temper finally got the better of him, and as the challenged, it was my choice of weaponry. Let’s see the hairy ape compete in a way requiring real finesse.” Then, looking mournfully at his pipe, “It’s a shame I can’t abide tobacco. The air a smoking pipe lends is so refined.”

Fans on the Internet are quickly dividing themselves into camps supporting their favorite author. “OMG this is gonna R0x0r”, writes one 1337h4ck3r2008. “Sim0n will PWN that n00b Kvoth.” KvotheLuvr90 has this to say: “Kvothe is, like, soooooo adorable and talented! There’s no way he’s going to lose to a sad sack like Simon – he can do, like, everything! He’ll probably trick Simon into losing and then write a song about what a whiny doofus the guy is.” Strangely, a few fans seemed unwilling to pick a side, not to mention uninformed as to the seriousness of the endeavor. Writes roseneko, “I like both authors and I’m looking forward to seeing what they come up with, even if the whole idea is firmly tongue-in-cheek.”

Though lengthy in duration, the actual source of the feud has never officially been established. Rumours have traced it to everything from beard envy to jealousy over fan submissions, but other than the occasional hints about its sordid nature, the authors have both remained mum on the subject. When asked, Rothfuss fixed us with a fearsome icy glare and said nothing. Strout merely quirked an eyebrow and said, “You’ll find out soon enough. When the armies start massing, if not before.”

Comments

[cyranocyrano.livejournal.com]

I had fully expected moustache combat.
I am disappointed.

[roseneko.livejournal.com]

Sadly, that'd be another form in which the respective parties would be poorly (http://www.antonstrout.com/Galleria_Disturbia.html) matched (http://www.patrickrothfuss.com/content/author.asp). :)

[cyranocyrano.livejournal.com]

Well, they did say character battle. I don't know about Simon, but Kvothe.....