missroserose | As the elevator operator said to passerby, "Life has its ups and downs."

The last week or so has been interesting for me, both in terms of a roller-coaster of sorts in mood swings and a study in how one aspect of my life can control my entire outlook on said life, if I let it.

It's been a week and a half since I got the no-job news from the library. (They ended up hiring Lana, who I'm sure will do fine; I'm not really that jealous, as both Lynn and Danél assured me that the interview scores were very close.) I was pretty crushed by the news, but I'd gotten over it by the next day and immediately started job-hunting again. I applied for the vet clinic and caviar receptionist jobs, it was all good. Over the next couple of days, no one calls me, I start to get nervous. I keep looking in the paper but nothing along the lines of what I want (receptionist-type, at least $10 an hour) shows up. I'm suddenly feeling desperate and start filling out other applications - the paper route, Wells Fargo teller, etc. - and get even more depressed because apparently nobody wants to hire me.

It all came to a head yesterday when I hadn't heard anything for more than a week; there wasn't anything in the paper that looked promising, nobody had called and I was about ready to give up on the receptionist idea and just head downtown and look for touristy work in one of the shops or apply at Fred Meyers or something. But once I'd gotten dressed up semi-nicely, I figured I'd give the vet clinic job (the one that I really wanted) one more try; they might give me an interview, and if not, the worst they can do is tell me "no", right? So I headed over there, asked for the office manager and asked if they'd done interviews yet, and she says, "No, but just one second and you can talk to Tracy." I read Cat Fancy for a couple of minutes and then get to meet Tracy, the woman I'd talked to on the phone before applying; she's very amused because apparently the two applicants she was most interested in (me and another guy named Brandon, I think) had shown up within five minutes of each other. She pretty much interviews and hires me there on the spot.

So I now have a job. It's been all of a week and a half since I started actively looking, and yet for much of that week and a half, it felt like I was going to be unemployed (and therefore, broke) forever, so it feels like it's been much longer. But this is pretty much the job I want - I get to be a nice friendly receptionist, I get to be around animals, I get to be in a pretty building with friendly people, and I start at $10 an hour - and even though it's only part time hours to start with, I'm pretty happy with it. (Ironically enough, Lana was somewhat jealous of me when I told her where I'd gotten hired - she apparently would really like to work there but doesn't have transportation.) And driving home I just felt on top of the world.

I think this goes to show that I need to have more faith in myself. If I feel overwhelmed it's usually because I'm focusing on the things I can't control. That kind of lessony-type thing. But hey - I've got a job that I'm pretty sure I'm going to like, I've got an apartment that I love, and a boyfriend who's the most wonderful person I've ever met. And I finally got my $200 security deposit back from the University, with an extra cent attached, no less.

I think I can stop being desperate and be happy about life, now.