Putting on my bitch boots so I can bitch for a moment...

[missroserose]

1.) I hate being broke, even temporarily.
2.) I hate being unable to make friends easily.
3.) I hate being lonely.
4.) I hate how shy I am in groups.
5.) I hate how contemptible humanity is in general, especially when individual people are often quite cool.
6.) I hate having nothing to do but not wanting to start any projects because I might not have time for them later.
7.) I hate the week-to-two-week delay checks take to show up on one's bank account.
8.) I hate how things take three times as long to ship to Alaska.
9.) I hate how easily the new version of Winamp freezes up.
10.) I hate how scared I am of achieving my dreams.
11.) I hate how scared I am of not achieving my dreams.
12.) I hate not having a decent stereo system for my music.
13.) I hate being unable to be emotionally intimate with someone I'm not sleeping with.
14.) I hate how much I care about how other people treat me.
15.) I hate how small and petty most people are.
16.) I hate how pathetic all our lives are, including my own.
17.) I hate the fact that it's scary to become part of something better, something more...and I hate how so many people never do.

Comments

encouragement from a stranger

[bkleber.livejournal.com]

well neither of us knows the other, but **HUG** all the same.

As for the rest of it... I have to agree with you on most of them. And while it isn't much to go on, I try to remember a few things.

Humans as a race are a pretty petty, pathetic and miserable lot. However, our overall importance in the universe is negligible--which somehow gives me the freedom, in my mind, to choose my friends and loved ones carefully as the ones who are not petty, the ones who try to make beauty and grace part of their existance. I don't have the power or influence to make everyone's world a better place all at once. But, if I try real hard, I can make my existance, and that of my friends, a more beautiful one. That can cascade from person to person, and eventually my efforts might mike a little ripple of happiness.

As for the rest... I admit I share many of your fears, desires, and fears at those desires. Many times I'll want for something in my life to change. I'll dwell on it, I'll think about it, I'll even wish for it. And eventually I'll just sit back and realize that maybe I do, and maybe I don't, and maybe I'm not as smart as I thought I was--and once I look the other way, whatever it was that I wanted, happens. But not the way I wanted it to. Usually it happens the right way, instead. {{unfortunately this hasn't worked on my desires or designs regarding a career of any sort--that one, i'm still trying for, and it keeps on not happening in rather dissapointing ways. And since that's a pretty important one to me and the path of my life, who knows how much of it is bunk?}}

I feel like there's something encouraging and worthwhile to say about not spending the energy hating all of those things but redirecting it elsewhere, but I can't find the words for it. Which is okay, since I've probably yammered far too much as it is.

[frogjimmy.livejournal.com]

It's a waste to be a hater.

Just smile more and relax. Sounds like stress.

I've never had the new WinAMP freeze. Do you want/need an older version?