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missroserose...I'm going to take this moment to examine the rather tempestuous love/hate relationship I have with my own sex. Or maybe just bitch about the fact that I haven't found another girlfriend since my first train-wreck lesbian relationship. Whatever.
To start with, I'm going to list the things that I believe about the female sex (note: these are my observations about my sex in my culture in general; not every tenet will apply to every woman):
A.) Women are manipulative, scheming, underhanded bitches.
B.) Women never say what they mean; this includes often not telling you when you're doing something they don't like.
C.) Women, due to having lived through several thousand years of societal constructs where they are allowed little overt power, have adapted by developing means of gaining power that are less obvious. Such methods include passive aggression, witholding of whatever is in their power to do so (sex, approval, validation, emotional support), seduction, and combining any number of these and other methods into schemes to hurt others and therefore have power over them.
D.) Women are usually much prettier than men.
E.) Most good-looking women know that they are good-looking, and try to use it to their advantage.
The thing is, I understand that while these rules may apply in the majority of cases, they're not all-encompassing, and there really are genuinely nice (and intelligent) women out there. The problem is, when I meet a woman who actually seems like she might be someone I wouldn't mind getting to know (perhaps intimately), I start to have a rather difficult time talking to her. I often suffer from male pattern drift (though fortunately women don't usually expect it from another woman, so I don't get smakked). I stumble over what I'm trying to say and end up flustered. In short, I act like a guy. And that doesn't get me anywhere.
And the fact that I've come to expect most of those behaviors from most women means that I don't go out of my way to interact with them. Which means that I only rarely meet a girl who doesn't fit the stereotype.
Hm. Maybe it's not so surprising after all that I can't find a girlfriend.
To start with, I'm going to list the things that I believe about the female sex (note: these are my observations about my sex in my culture in general; not every tenet will apply to every woman):
A.) Women are manipulative, scheming, underhanded bitches.
B.) Women never say what they mean; this includes often not telling you when you're doing something they don't like.
C.) Women, due to having lived through several thousand years of societal constructs where they are allowed little overt power, have adapted by developing means of gaining power that are less obvious. Such methods include passive aggression, witholding of whatever is in their power to do so (sex, approval, validation, emotional support), seduction, and combining any number of these and other methods into schemes to hurt others and therefore have power over them.
D.) Women are usually much prettier than men.
E.) Most good-looking women know that they are good-looking, and try to use it to their advantage.
The thing is, I understand that while these rules may apply in the majority of cases, they're not all-encompassing, and there really are genuinely nice (and intelligent) women out there. The problem is, when I meet a woman who actually seems like she might be someone I wouldn't mind getting to know (perhaps intimately), I start to have a rather difficult time talking to her. I often suffer from male pattern drift (though fortunately women don't usually expect it from another woman, so I don't get smakked). I stumble over what I'm trying to say and end up flustered. In short, I act like a guy. And that doesn't get me anywhere.
And the fact that I've come to expect most of those behaviors from most women means that I don't go out of my way to interact with them. Which means that I only rarely meet a girl who doesn't fit the stereotype.
Hm. Maybe it's not so surprising after all that I can't find a girlfriend.
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no subject
Date: 2004-07-27 05:46 pm (UTC)And the real part that sucks is where you realise that the vast majority of them are only (secretly) interested in sex... but then from what (little) I know of the lesbian community, you prolly get to experience significantly less of that, so at least that's one saving grace.
I had a point, and that was... don't give up... when you get right down to it the majority of both sexes are absolutely horrible wastes of space and valuable air. But that doesn't mean there isn't someone who's just perfect for you.
But what would I know. I just randomly saw your post from off
no subject
Date: 2004-07-27 06:32 pm (UTC)Then he started ignoring me/treating me like shit, I started getting clingy to him, we started see-sawing ("I want you"/"Well I don't want you anymore" to "Fine, I don't want you"/"Okay now I want you back" to "Alright, you can have me"/"I don't think I can trust you anymore"...you get the deal) and after two years of it, I'd had enough. I've kind of gotten out of the mindset where there's that "one special someone" for me. It's more that I just wonder if I'll ever be able to get over my prejudices enough to find another girlfriend...
no subject
Date: 2004-07-27 10:21 pm (UTC)("I want you"/"Well I don't want you anymore" to "Fine, I don't want you"/"Okay now I want you back" to "Alright, you can have me"/"I don't think I can trust you anymore"...you get the deal) = Perfect example of what I'm talking about when I say human stupidity. It's human nature to always want what you can't have... I went through a similar thing with my best friend before we finally got pissed off and gave up... every time she was in a relationship, I'd want her. Every time she wasn't, she'd want me, and I wouldn't want her as anything more than a friend. But in the end I think we would never have worked together, so the wanting what you can't have thing doesn't work.
Apologies. I'm just rambling really, sorry if it sounds like bad pseudo-psychology. My point was that very few people in the world are at all worth your time, and maybe before trying to find someone that is, you should be absolutely sure that you're not going to make it all go horribly wrong. Call me naive if you want, but I think you have all the time in the world to do so... if it was meant to happen, it's going to happen.
no subject
Date: 2004-07-28 12:05 am (UTC)Really? That's funny, because it's my experience with gay men.
LMFAO!
Date: 2004-07-28 12:52 am (UTC)Re: LMFAO!
Date: 2004-07-28 03:40 am (UTC)