missroserose | On the religious implications of fast food

(TMI warning. Turn back now.)

Me: You've been in there for half an hour. Are you okay?

Brian: I had a sausage sandwich from Safeway. I don't think it's agreeing with me. You know that feeling when everything's hovering just on the brink?

Me: We could take you to Taco Bell. The legendary Taco Bell Shits should clear everything right out.

Brian: ...No. No. Two wrongs don't make a right. And the resulting bowel movement would likely qualify as a Defilement.

Me: Yeah, I don't think I want to pay for a monk to reconsecrate our bathroom...